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Virtual Mourning
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Parents will tell you, there is no greater pain than losing a child. For one Ohio mother, the grief was overwhelming and she was in fear of losing her faith. It was in this darkest hour she found strength and refuge in an unlikely place — online. |
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Virtual Mourning – STORY:
Bonnie Bertleson: “He gave me away at our wedding.”
Ever since her 22-year-old son Leon was found murdered in a Chicago suburb, Bonnie Bertleson has sought peace — at her bird feeder, in her memorial garden, but most of all at the computer.
Bonnie Bertleson, Founder of BUMP: “It’s hard to describe because, even though I’ve never met these people face-to-face, it’s like we’re friends.”
Bonnie needed a place to share everything that comes with the death of a child. She turned to the Internet and created her own support group called BUMP — Bereaved United Methodist Parents.
Bonnie Bertleson: “They know that pain and emptiness, and for someone to say, ‘Well, it’s God’s will,’ that doesn’t help. That does not help. That hurts.”
And so from her computer in New Lebanon, Ohio, Bonnie reached out and found people all over the country.
Vicky Miles from Montana writes: “BUMP gives me a voice among friends. It’s a place I can voice my grief, my guilt, my fears and my memories. I need to be honest and sometimes even blunt about how the world is treating me.”
Bereaved parents from 20 different states are members of this e-mail support group.
The Internet and e-mail, so often maligned as an impersonal way to communicate, are in this case tender and intimate.
Deacon Dave: “You won’t see my name often here on the e-mail list, but I’m here in the background, on the edge of the conversation. I do a lot of listening.”
And Bonnie has done a lot of listening too, and found so much healing.
Bonnie Bertleson: “Open hearts, open minds, open doors. I really love that thought.”
In New Lebanon, Ohio, I’m Lindsay Ferrier reporting.
Virtual Mourning – TAG:
If you would like to join BUMP, you can e-mail Bonnie at Bonnieb@abac.com, or you can find the link on UMC.org. Just type the word BUMP in the search engine.